Dear Overwhelmed Mum: Why You're Not Failing (And How to Reclaim Your Peace)

Dear Beautiful Soul,

I see you there, surrounded by toys scattered across the floor, dishes piled in the sink, and that mounting to-do list that seems to grow longer by the minute. I see the weight you're carrying – not just in your arms as you juggle children and chores, but in your heart, where that persistent voice whispers, "You're not doing enough."

Let me pause right here and tell you something important: "You are not failing! I promise you!"

The Truth About Your "Messy" Life

That pile of laundry? It means your children have clothes to wear. Those dirty dishes? They're evidence that your family is fed. The toys strewn across the floor? They're proof of play, learning, and life being lived fully in your home.

Yet society has conditioned us to see these signs of life as failures.

This misconception creates a cycle of stress and self-doubt that pulls us further from our inner peace.

It’s time we change this!

You see, your worth isn't measured by:

The state of your house
The number of home-cooked meals you make
How many activities you juggle
Whether you remembered every school event

Your worth is inherent.

It exists in...

The love that flows from your heart
The strength you show by getting up each day
The resilience you model when things don't go as planned
The authentic way you show up, even when it's messy

And most importantly, your worth exists in simply being you – a mother who loves deeply and tries her best every single day. Those quiet moments when you question yourself? They're proof of how much you care, how deeply you love, and how committed you are to this beautiful, messy journey of motherhood.

Remember, the very fact that you worry about being "enough" shows just how much you already are.

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When the overwhelm kicks in and you feel like you’re failing…

Try this…

When everything feels overwhelming, remember this: being mindfully grounded doesn't mean having a perfect life – it means finding your centre even when life is messy.

1. Start With Your Breath

When the overwhelm hits, pause. Take three deep breaths. Feel your feet connecting with the ground. This is a simple practice I use regularly, and it can be a great way to instantly shift your nervous system from fight-or-flight to a calmer state. Don’t strive for perfect… there is no such thing.

2. Create Grounding Moments of Heart-Based Mindfulness

Create Grounding Moments in your day. These are micro-moments which can be especially powerful when overwhelm threatens to take over.

They are tiny pauses that anchor you back to the present when everything feels too much.

Focus on heart-based mindfulfulness, that is connecting with your heart to something in the moment. This brings you out of your head and into your heart. Focus your attention on feeling heart based emotions liked gratitude, awe, appreciation or love. You may feel your heart start to warm or imagine it glowing.

Here are some things to try…

- When anxiety rises, breath in deeply, then breath out visioning your breath travelling down to your feet and connecting with the earth. Focus on your feet touching the earth and repeat as long as required. This is a truely grounding experience.
- Pouring a coffee with heart-based mindfulness.
- Getting lost in a moment of awe. Discover a strong tree, a beautiful flower or the way the sun creates beautiful colours in the trees.
- When emotions feel intense, pause to notice five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This works a treat with emotional regulation for yourself or your kids.
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Remember, these Grounding Moments don't need to be long or complicated. They're simple anchors that help you return to yourself when overwhelm starts to build. Even 30 seconds of mindful connection can shift your entire emotional state.

3. Create Pockets of Peace

You don't need hour-long meditation sessions to find inner calm. Instead:

- Set up a small corner in your home where you can take 2-minute breathing breaks
- Keep a gratitude journal by your bedside for quick evening reflections
- Use daily tasks as mindfulness triggers (like taking three deep breaths every time you check your phone)

Redefining Success on Your Terms

Success isn't measured by how spotless your house is or how many items you check off your to-do list. True success is about:

- Being present with your children, even if just for small moments throughout the day
- Showing yourself compassion when things don't go as planned
- Finding small ways to nourish your soul amidst the chaos

A Gentle Reminder: Your Children See Love, Not Perfection

Your children don't see the unfolded laundry or the unwashed windows. They see a mother who loves them, who shows up every day, who tries her best even when it's hard. They feel your presence, your love, your dedication – and that's what matters most.

Your Invitation to Peace

Today, I invite you to release the burden of perfection. To breathe deeply into this moment, exactly as it is. To remember that being mindfully grounded isn't about having everything together – it's about finding your centre in the beautiful mess of motherhood.

You're not failing, dear mama. You're living, loving, and growing. And that's more than enough.

With gentle support,

Bec